Wednesday, August 04, 2010
I'm an undercover stuntman. And a part-time grizzly bear.
I built a robot. And taught it how to "reach around."
I fought in the war "without a helmet."
I was a power ranger.
I was the stunt mustache for Burt Reynolds in Canonball Run Two.
I can tumble down the side of a mountain without breaking any bones.
I killed a ninja.
I wouldn't let let the doctors take my appendix out.
I drive a Mazarati that used to be leased to DMX's cousin.
I own a sandwich shop in conjunction with Matthew McConaughey.
I have an appropriate ballsack to penis ratio.
I slipped the maitre d' a twenty.
I capitalize appropriately.
My t-shirt fits snugly.
My pants are made from the finest Italian leather. Natural oils within the leather prevent chafing.
I am handsome.
I am the Great Dane of people.
So who are you to de-friend me on Facebook?